Driving a rental car through the northern Italian countryside for 36 hours is about as relaxing as a root canal. Speed limits seem to be a light suggestion, and those sloping verdant peaks that look so serene as you approach from the nearest city turn out to be full of hairpin turns, rife for harrowing tailgating incidents with truck drivers who have all apparently just remembered they have urgent appointments. (That perfect linen dress you found for sale at a thrift shop on your block—the one you think makes you look just like Sophia Loren? It won’t save you.)

Which is to say, when you get to wherever your destination may be, you’re going to want to put a lot of things in your mouth.